With every word she said, my heart broke into another piece.
“I just feel so ugly when I look in the mirror.”
She listed every feature on her beautiful head that she wished was different.
Really, now? Eleven years old and already the enemy is whispering lies to my little girl, leaving her feeling less than other girls her age.
I listed all the ways she was so beautiful - that I loved her freckles sprinkled across her nose, the pouty lips, her blue eyes. But, all of those features would be nothing without her heart, and she has one of the kindest, most thoughtful hearts on any girl.
I told her about how she is created in the image of God, and I read her the verses that told her how fearfully and wonderfully made she is.
And then I paused thinking back to earlier that day as I was getting ready. I looked in the mirror that morning and disappointingly saw a face bearing lines, chubby cheeks, and weight left over after four babies that I can never seem to lose like all of my friends.
I just feel so ugly when I look in the mirror.
So, I told my little girl that - I told her what I see when I look in the mirror, and how it makes me feel, and she cried heartfelt tears because she loves me and she doesn’t see what I see.
With our kids, sometimes telling them the truth doesn’t seem to work. There are times Bible verses don’t feel like they work. It’s hard to hear what God’s Word says about you when those toxic thoughts are screaming so loud inside your head. It doesn’t make His Word less true; it only means those feelings right now are so very real.
She needed a “me too” at that moment. She needed to know that those feeling she’s struggling with are not isolated to only her.
We’ll talk more in the days to come about how to combat the enemy's lies, how we can’t stay stuck in those thoughts because he knows that if he can get us to remain there, then he can get us to start making wrong choices and lead us down a path we’ll regret.
And, I am reminded that my girls are watching, listening, for the words I say when I look in the mirror. Do my girls have a momma who lives out what she tells them to believe about themselves?
I am fearfully and wonderfully made, made in the image of a good God. But, do I truly believe it?